the nadir

it’s winter solstice today.  the shortest day and the longest night of the year.

which feels like it should create a sensation somewhere in the range of gloomy to soul crushing.

and yet.

i just finished my last day of work before eleven days off.

i put the last of my holiday cards in yesterday’s mail.

there are tiny white lights on a tree in my living room.  made all the more magical by the big, long darkness happening outside.

that christmas happens at the same time as the year’s longest, darkest night is part of the reason i think people love it so… it happens when we feel a need to gather around the hearth and huddle in the dark.  we feel safe and protected and cocooned up with the people who mean the most to us.  and even though, sometimes, the people we need are not really close enough to wrap up in our cocoons, the efforts we make to send that intention through cards and gifts and phone calls can feel almost as good.

this day.  this day that i woke and went to sleep to in the dark.  this day has as much darkness as there will ever be. and the beauty of recognizing this low point – that this is as long as the night will get – is knowing that it’s only getting better from here on out.