This is my boot. Specifically, my right boot.
I’m not the first chubby girl to complain of such, but it’s hard to find boots that close over my calves; they’re just too fat. I still buy boots sometimes, though, and I muscle those zippers up with determination. I may squeeze my calves into oblivian and I may be left with horrible red indentations. And maybe I flounce around with muffin top calves. But whatever. Sometimes I engange in commerce and exchange money for boots.
These particular boots are causing me an awesome bit of pain that I’d like to document here. So there’s that boot up there. See the wrinkles around the ankle? See that crease? The dent pressing in? Well that little bitch is like a baseball bat that’s been whacking me in the ankle all day long, leaving me with a red evil welt just above my ankle. If only my calf were just a wee bit thinner, then the boot might be contented to stay up there where it should. Instead, it tries to be sly and slip down lower, to where the goods are a bit thinner – thus evil creases.
I like them, though, these boots of mine and chances are I will wear them again and the welt gremlin will reappear. Perhaps he and I should just try to be friends. I’m going to call him Curtis.
I am having troubles putting down a little bit in writing. Partially it feels like I’ve not got anything to say, but then I think about all the things that have happened and that seems crazy. Or lazy. Oopsy daisy.
So before I forget that these things have even happened, I’m just going to jot them down a little bit. Maybe I’ll come back for more. We’ll see.
I have another job interview tomorrow. I’m not particularly optimistic about getting it, which also means that I’m not desperately wanting it. I suppose I’m not also doing a super job of prepping for it, but scoff. I am feeling a bit disdainful of all the work you’re “supposed” to do for a job interview and then they opt not to give you the damn job.
I got another nephew. Leonard was born on April 10. And while he might be called Leo, my brother chose to name his offspring Leonard and if that’s not proof that he needs a really good therapist, then there is no such thing as proof.
And then Leo had a thing with his bowel and he had to have surgery when he was 3 days old and there was a lot of unhappiness and worry about this, but it seems like he must be fine now. I will go see him later when he’s less boring.
My very good friend Nina ran in the Big Sur marathon on Sunday, so the David and I went down to see her. We stayed in a big old victorian mansion bed & breakfast and it was flowery^5 and cute and I liked it a lot. It was a gorgeous sunny weekend, and a nice drive down, and the first weekend in months and months that I’d had the David at home, not in Tahoe, and not working all weekend. Nina survived the marathon. It was kind of a miracle. To me anyway.
Lastly, peas are finally in season and I’m not eating another apple for 6 months.
Last night I had a dream that I’ve actually remember and it amused me a lot, so I’m writing it down.
Chuck was working on invention. It was a tube that you could pass things through to transcend space and time.
[And this makes who the bigger nerd? Me for having a nerdy sci-fi dream that literally includes the phrase “transcend space and time” or Chuck for being the creator of such a device?]
The prototype of this device looked like the tube-y part of a feather duster, pictured here for your edification. So Chuck is explaining this workings of his device to me and Jessica, at length, in great technical detail. She and I are sitting together, side by side. And Jessica, in her way is looking attentive and interested. Who knows what I am looking like. I do not have that way.
And then, without changing her demeanor in any way, Jessica nudged me with her elbow. And I knew! She had no idea what he was talking about either! Possibly due to the huge impediment of not caring whatsoever.
I think maybe that it was really David who nudged me in the reality realm and that if he hadn’t have done so, maybe I would have learned how to transcend space and time. Except who am I kidding. I wasn’t paying attention anyway.
I am horrified to report that The David crash crash crashity crashed his car yesterday while coming home from Tahoe by himself. On the 80. Going 70 mph. Crash into the guardrail. Spin out. And then facing the oncoming traffic. And he has no idea why it happened.
Important take aways here:
THE DAVID IS NOT DEAD.
The David is not hurt.
No other cars crashed in to him and no one else was hurt.
Even so, I can’t think about it without feeling nervous and panicked and possibly like pooping. And I can’t stop thinking about it. Because oh my god, what if. What If?! I am refusing to actually expand upon the rest of the “what if” thought because it’s just to awful to imagine. Or talk about. Or write about.
So I’m just generically freaking out.
And now, without a car, he’s biking in to work and planning to do so indefinitely, which makes me nervous, as well. All that unprotected poppet body exposed to the elements and the automobiles!
How rather perversely horrible it is to care about someone so much that you have all this worry and fear about what the outside world might do to him. When it might be so much nicer to just stay safe in a little nest where I can make lots of macaroni and cheese and no one ever gets paper cuts.